I Think we may have met the the Author of My Big Fat Greek Wedding

Despina is her name. She runs an organisation providing walking tours of Athens. Her profile: aged 55, hard as old boots, not good at conversation, has definite ideas on Greek superiority and Turkish villainy. She delivered what we asked... a recount of Athens history linked to the local landscape. We found her on the Web... booked a tour immediately on landing... and were ready to go at 9:30am yesterday.

You remember the 'dad' from the movie. He went to extraordinary lengths to claim a Greek origin for every word uttered by the prospective son-in-law. Despina took the same approach with her walking group. To give you an example, Joye saw a bunch of wild daisies growing by the path. Joye said, "What a nice bunch of daisies" Despina corrected her. "These are Jasmine. This is a Greek word made from two parts... Jas... which relates back to the god of nature sometimes known as Jassmena... and the second part Mine which of course comes from" la di da di da.

I made the big mistake of saying that the Queen of Australia is married to a member of the Greek royal family. It took ten minutes for Despina to correct my misunderstandings. First, Greeks have never had royalty. Greek people invented democracy and have always treasured democracy. There were attempts to have royalty thrust upon them by appointing foreigners to a position called the king/queen of the Greece. Streets and buildings were named after such interlopers, but the people never held affection for such monarchs. Second, (I was waiting for this because I just knew poor old Phil would not come out of this unscathed) Phil was never a Greek and was never a royal... bad luck Phil... thank goodness Elizabeth did not find out!

You have to love people of high emotions. As far as Despina was concerned, the war against the Turks did not end in 1947 ... it is still going! One of her primary grievances arises from the fact that Turkey is not a proper country because it is only 900 years old.

The more outrageous her claims of Greek greatness, the more likeable she became. She is so proud of her cultural heritage and Greece needs lots of these types in the short term .